About 10 years ago my life, the life that I had created, the life that I had fabricated hit a dead end. The road, the solid surface under my feet disappeared. The road ahead of me, my future, vanished. The road behind me, the path that brought me to the place I stood, was littered with regret, shame and anger. I found myself in the terrifying position of being frozen in place, unable to move forward or go back.
“Mistakes are part of life. Everyone makes them. Everyone regrets them. But some learn from them and some end up making them again. It’s up to you to decide if you’ll use your mistakes to your advantage.” – Meredith Sapp
I don’t know too many perfect people. Everyone carries some sort of baggage with them. Baggage can be quiet and personal, very private and internal or it can make the front-page of the local newspaper for the world, at least everyone in your world to see. None of us are in a position to judge the good or bad of someone else’s baggage, to decide if one sin is worse than another. We all have our own preconceived notions about the magnitude of sin. Certainly it would seem that taking someone’s life is much worse than driving drunk but that line could be blurred in the matter of seconds.
“Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have—life itself.” – Walter Anderson
I am not a Psychiatrists or a counselor, I am simply someone who made a U-turn in the darkness back towards the light. I can’t undo past regrets but I can accept them as my mistakes, my baggage, and live each day in the present moments that I have left. Will the rest of my life be perfect and peaceful? No, that sounds like the description of being in a coma. I expect the road ahead of me to be filled with potholes, speed-bumps and stop signs but it is a road I will gladly travel in the light because I have experienced life in the dark, at the end of a dead-end road.