Same Book different results

Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, “Don’t do it!” He said, “Nobody loves me.” I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?”

He said, “Yes.” I said, “Are you a Christian or a Jew?” He said, “A Christian.” I said, “Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?” He said, “Protestant.” I said, “Me, too! What franchise?” He said, “Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?” He said, “Northern Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?”

He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?” He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region.” I said, “Me, too!”

Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?” He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.” I said, “Die, heretic!” And I pushed him over.- Emo Philips

“It’s hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.” – Bill Watterson, Calvin & Hobbes

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About ends and beginnings blog

I am a frustrated writer and poet waiting to be discovered. A stand-up philosopher performing on a street corner near you. A Christian with questions but I don’t want to hear your answers. A Buddhist with a bumper sticker on my truck to prove it. A collector of quotes. A grower of lettuce. The Patron Saint of earthworms who name their children after me. A cyclist whose big ass strains the seams of his Lycra bibs. I am American by birth, Southern by the grace of God. My goal in life is to leave an imprint on the lives of the people I love not a footprint on the earth. I am a son, a husband, a father composed of 65%-Oxygen, 18%-Carbon, 10%-Hydrogen, 3%-Nitrogen, 3%-Diet Coke and 1%-Oreo.
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3 Responses to Same Book different results

  1. Thank you for sharing this, I loved the irony…we are all trying to return to source, find eternal light, what we call it shouldn’t matter…what do you think of the Pope? Genuine question, just I was talking to someone the other day and they couldn’t see past the figure representing the tyranny of the Catholic church to the goodness of the man…

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am a big fan of the Pope. Each Pope has the weight of 2,000 years on his shoulders. Moving anything, let alone a community of faith, down the path of today and tomorrow rather than yesterday (this is how we do it) is a big job. I hope he remains healthy.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you that’s reassured me since the person I was speaking to made me feel stupid for defending what he saw.as an icon of oppression

    Liked by 1 person

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