A white southern male-my story


I am a 50 + year old white southern male. Now with that very simple description here are some things you might infer about me;

  1. I like to fish and hunt.- I don’t, I hate the way deer meat taste and I love Bambi.
  2. I own a pick-up truck. – I do, with a Coexist and Free Tibet sticker on it.
  3. I honor the confederate flag. – I don’t, the honor was drained 60 years ago.
  4. I like to drink beer. – I do, craft beers I might add.
  5. I wear cowboy boots. – I don’t, birkenstocks or flip-flops.
  6. I follow NASCAR. – I do, when Tony Stewart retires I won’t.
  7. I am still fighting the civil war. – I don’t, we lost, it wasn’t even close.
  8. I love college football. – I do, but my wife loves it more.
  9. I am a Southern Baptist. – Have you read my blog?
  10. I talk with a slow drawl. – I do, you will want to finish my sentences.

I bristle at times at how the typical white southern male is stereotyped in the media or in the movies. I have neither a mullet cut, a dirty confederate flag baseball cap, cut-off blue jeans, wife beater tank-top, or a jaw full of chewing tobacco. Oh, and I have all of my teeth.

If I didn’t open my mouth you would have no idea I was southern. But the minute I did, when you heard the first y’all or ma’am slip through my lips you would know and then the wheels would begin turning.

I say on my Who I am page that I am “American by birth, Southern by the grace of God”. I embrace my Southern heritage. My ancestors were not slave owners, they were hard-working, resilient people from England, Ireland and Scotland that scratched a living in the hard earth to provide and survive. Were they racist? Hard to know, but given the time and place, probably. Does that heritage make me a racist? In your mind it may, but my parents created a different mindset, a different heritage within our family.

I have carried that same mindset a generation further and added an additional “category”, the LGBT community. My wife and I have stressed the need for acceptance and tolerance with our children, that the term “love your neighbor” cast a much wider net than many in our society accept, practice or believe. This position has isolated us in our Red state. It has even isolated us in our own neighborhood making for, at times, very uncomfortable dinner party conversation.

Yes I am a white southern male, proud of my heritage and trying to create a new one of acceptance, compassion and love. I hope other sons of the south will have the courage to join me and yes you can still kill Bambi’s mom and dad if you need too.


About ends and beginnings blog

I am a frustrated writer and poet waiting to be discovered. A stand-up philosopher performing on a street corner near you. A Christian with questions but I don’t want to hear your answers. A Buddhist with a bumper sticker on my truck to prove it. A collector of quotes. A grower of lettuce. The Patron Saint of earthworms who name their children after me. A cyclist whose big ass strains the seams of his Lycra bibs. I am American by birth, Southern by the grace of God. My goal in life is to leave an imprint on the lives of the people I love not a footprint on the earth. I am a son, a husband, a father composed of 65%-Oxygen, 18%-Carbon, 10%-Hydrogen, 3%-Nitrogen, 3%-Diet Coke and 1%-Oreo.
This entry was posted in Life, Thoughts, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

22 Responses to A white southern male-my story

  1. K says:

    Thank you for doing your part to reclaim southern people and move things into a higher consciousness.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Cara says:

    I get it. I’m an Italian-American woman from Brooklyn, NY. You might infer, based solely on that knowledge, that

    1. I tawk like Marisa Tomei in “My Cousin Vinnie”-I don’t, I was an English major in college and I speak very well, thank you.

    2. I’m a Catholic & always wear a cross-yeah, no, I don’t ascribe to any organized religion.

    3. Every guy I date is named Vinnie, Paulie, Joey-again, nope. Fabian was a lot of fun.

    4. I live in the tanning salon-I’ve never been.

    5. My hair is enormous-no, never that. Sleek and shiny.

    When I think of southerners, I think of great literary minds…Tennessee Williams.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Patricia says:

    I too and tired of the stereotypes: it gets on my nerves to see the way country western dancing, women’s hairdos, exaggerated accents, lack of education, plus all the examples you listed are used in movies. That being said there are a lot of cultural traditions and beliefs passed down that are pretty “redneck” borne out of ignorance. I am proud to be a southern girl from Texas. The funny thing is that I talk about the friendliness and helpfulness of people in Colorado but most people I meet have some sort of roots in Texas. Not to take away from the locals, they are really good people.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Gina Marie says:

    Thank your for your post! As a transplant to the South from the West Coast, I must say people are much nicer. It was a weird transition for me. But, as you say in your post, it is a bit more awkward when some people realize my WIFE and I moved here. Some think it’s pretty cool, while others obviously worry that, by even talking to us, we might cause them to spend at least a week in hell when they die. So far, no pitchforks in the front yard to demand we leave town. 🙂 But, it’s important to remember not to lump all Southerners into any group.

    Liked by 1 person

    • In my community we are just at the early stages of seeing racially mixed couples, common place in large southern cities like Atlanta and Charlotte but relatively new in my medium size city. We have several gay couples (men and women) that not only attend but are members of my traditional protestant Church, again a new front in this city. It’s a new world Ms. Gina. My children don’t even take a second glance at mixed or gay couples. Change never happens as quick as we would like for it too, but change waits for no one, you can fight it, you can ignore it, and sadly you can shoot at it, but you can’t stop it. If hell is in someone’s forecast simply because of their sexuality then it is just one item in a very long list of other reasons that will get many of us sent there. If this is true, my guess, it will be very crowded.

      Liked by 2 people

  5. Just an awesome post! Thanks for sharing. 🙂 G-uno

    Liked by 1 person

  6. What a great post, thank you so much for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Ashlee says:


    My name is Ashlee. I’m co-founder of the Youshare Project, with the mission to connect people around the world through true, personal stories. I recently stumbled across your blog and read the above post entitled “A white southern male – my story.” It’s so honest and beautifully written.I think it would make a wonderful Youshare, because part of our mission is to shatter stigmas and stereotypes. And this of course is one big stereotype that I think a lot of people would like to see disappear.

    If this sounds interesting to you, I would love to email you directly with more information and formally invite you to adapt your story to Youshare and share it with the project. You have my email address and website. I hope to hear from you soon.



    • Ashlee thank you for your wonderful comments. I am glad you enjoyed my post. I write anonymously which gives me the freedom to work on my craft without the glare or spotlight of personal criticism (I am my toughest critic). I hope, in the near future, I will be ready for a bigger stage at which point I will need to include and clue my family into this process. I may never get there but I have enjoyed growing the current audience I have in these six short months. I hope you will read more of my work in the future. I am always open to topic ideas as well as discussion, agree or disagree, of my opinions. Thank you again for your interest.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Ashlee says:

        Thank you for responding to my comment. I certainly understand your position and wish you all the best with your writing. I’ll definitely check back in to read your blog, and if/when you decide you’re ready to share on another website, we’d welcome your story(ies) with open arms. All my best, Ashlee

        Liked by 1 person

        • Thank you so much Ashlee. Blogging is a weird and quirky little world. I have had a lot of support which has helped my fragile ego. I am dyslexic and my grammar sucks so I have a number of writing battles I deal with. Thank God for spell check :). Take care.


  8. Pingback: Hate not heritage: The Confederate Battle Flag | Ends and Beginnings

  9. Pingback: The Folly of history, heritage and culture | Ends and Beginnings

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s