“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” – Maya Angelou,
I am no different from anyone else, I would rather be in control than be controlled. In my mind the arithmetic is easy, me plus control equals happiness. The reality is the only control I have is my reaction too my lack of control.
I don’t consider myself to be a control freak, yes I do get wound up about things from time to time, thank you Donald J. Trump, but for the most part I am a pretty laid back, go with the flow kind of a guy. I am not big on making a list or having an agenda. If someone has a better idea or plan I am typically flexible enough to change mine. My one real quirk is that I hate to be late, particularly when someone is expecting me. I think I have mellowed somewhat on this little idiosyncrasy but you couldn’t convince my wife and kids of that.
So anyway, what can we control? The simple answer is not much if anything other than our attitude. The hard truth is we are all expendable. The world will rock on without us, it won’t even skip a beat. Sure there are people who will be sad we are no longer here. But except for those we are most close to the memory of our existence will simply fade away. We can’t control that either.
I have a number of external “things” that control my actions. I have a mortgage on my house which means I need to work. I have people who I need to please at work so I can pay my mortgage. I have a world that I need to function in, and laws to obey. These are all “things” that control me, control how I act, control what I can say or not say, control how I look, and dress. Expectations are control, my children expect their Dad to act a certain way, so does my wife. Sure they may give me a little latitude here or there, like wearing cuff and pleated pants, apparently a fashion faux pas, but at the end of the day I got married, had children, and that was my choice and that choice, that decision controls me hopefully until the day I die.
“To enjoy good health, to bring true happiness to one’s family, to bring peace to all, one must first discipline and control one’s own mind. If a man can control his mind he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will naturally come to him.” – Buddha
I have four years to figure out how to co-exist in this world with our President. I am sure he is going to do a lot of things to piss me off between now and then. I am equally sure that I will use this forum to vent about it. But at the end of the day the only way anyone can take me down is if I allow them too. My mind and my heart are mine to give, and mine to control. I promise to give both freely to those I love and the things I care about in this world. Our President may not be on that list but in truth he is. He is part of the same world that I belong too, and care for. A world I can’t control but one that I am happy to exist in for however long I can hold on.
“Freedom is the only worthy goal in life. It is won by disregarding things that lie beyond our control.” – Epictetus