Free Bird

“We are always happy to welcome visitors, but I believe the Vice President’s valuable time would be better spent at the border trying to fix the mess created by the Biden administration’s failed immigration policies.” – South Carolina Governor Henry “Foghorn Leghorn” McMaster

Vice President Kamala Harris will make a stop in Greenville, SC next week as part of her “nation-wide tour to reach millions of Americans who still need protection against the virus”. South Carolina’s Governor, the legendary Henry “Foghorn Leghorn” McMaster decided to take a swipe at our Vice President on twitter with his observations on how better she should use her time.

Now keep in mind, in four years I never heard or read “Foghorn Leghorn” ever advise The Former Guy (TFG) that he shouldn’t have played golf 307 days out of the 1,460 days that he kept the Presidential seat warm for Joe Biden. Just as an aside, it has been estimated that TFG’s “exercise” cost us, the American taxpayers, $140,000,000.00. Let me write that out for you: One Hundred and Forty Million dollars.

Here is another interesting thing about “Foghorn Leghorn’s” political advice to the Vice President and it has to do with geography. The state that he is the potentate over is not on the Mexican border. We are bordered by the Atlantic Ocean, Georgia, and North Carolina. I suspect he may think he is close to the border from time to time when he is playing golf at his Country Club, which after only 94 years finally added its first black member who just happens to be a woman (covers all the bases) and sees all the brown skin people mowing the grass or serving him a Mint julep over in the men’s grill.

“I say, I SAY, where are all the colored boys? We need to build us a wall on the Georgia border to keep these Mexicans out of the Great State of South Carolina accept, of course, when it is time for them to pick tomatoes.”   

Speaking of “Foghorn Leghorn’s” Country Club, the President of the club at the time that they allowed a single black person to join noted that the Country Club does not discriminate against blacks but that none have accepted invitations to join the club. The Club President said in a statement that the club has members of unspecified “religious and ethnic groups.” Right, unspecified religions like Baptist, Presbyterian, Methodist, and maybe a token Lutheran. And ethnic groups? I am sure they have lots of ethnic diversity, English, Scottish, Irish, German, maybe a few Canadians and of course Americans by God.

“I say, I SAY, we are a damn black kettle of succotash.

I am sorry that the rest of the world associates South Carolina with Ms. Lindsay Graham, Henry “Foghorn Leghorn” McMaster, and Myrtle Beach. Yes, 50% of our population are cigarette smoking, illiterate, beer belly, racist inbreeds, covered in homemade tattoos who think NASCAR is a sport and Free Bird should be our national anthem. And then we have the 25% that make-up the white gentry, the nobility like “Foghorn Leghorn” who are convinced that slavery wasn’t all that bad, and that black people really do miss it (true fact).

And then there is me and my family, probably less than 25% of the South Carolina population but I am trying to be optimistic. We realize that the 50% are making babies, which most of these rednecks list as their number one hobby, at a rate that will keep the state down for generations, 42nd in health, 44th in education, 46th in crime. Remember, there are only 50 states.

It would seem to me that Governor Henry “Foghorn Leghorn” McMaster has plenty of other things that he could work on for the citizens of South Carolina. Instead, he wants to make sure everyone can carry a gun in public, and that those brown people only come to our Great State when it is time to pick vegetables and mow the grass at his Country Club. Of course, after they are done, they need scurry back across the border to Georgia.

“Boy, I say, BOY, are you lost?”       

About ends and beginnings blog

I am a frustrated writer and poet waiting to be discovered. A stand-up philosopher performing on a street corner near you. A Christian with questions but I don’t want to hear your answers. A Buddhist with a bumper sticker on my truck to prove it. A collector of quotes. A grower of lettuce. The Patron Saint of earthworms who name their children after me. A cyclist whose big ass strains the seams of his Lycra bibs. I am American by birth, Southern by the grace of God. My goal in life is to leave an imprint on the lives of the people I love not a footprint on the earth. I am a son, a husband, a father composed of 65%-Oxygen, 18%-Carbon, 10%-Hydrogen, 3%-Nitrogen, 3%-Diet Coke and 1%-Oreo.
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5 Responses to Free Bird

  1. Got my juices flowing, my friend….and I thought Florida was a racist shithole.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. A note to your readers….I live in Florida so I can call the “sunshine’ state whatever I like.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Nan says:

    I say … I say … (as I’ve said before): You DO have a way with words!!

    Liked by 1 person

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