I am OCD primarily about three things; a clean and organized car, a clean and organized garage and a clean and organized workshop. Notice a trend? All three of these are “my” space. I don’t worry about a clean house, clean sheets or clean towels, I have a OCD wife that takes care of that for us. It’s good to have OCD balance in a household.
Sunday morning, as I was surveying my neatly arrange garage though commiserating that I needed to sweep it out, I noticed a moth caught in a spider’s web under my hot water heater. It was a sad sight watching the moth struggle as the spider spun its web around it. If I didn’t intervene this would be a death sentence for the moth. Honestly even if I did help there would be no way to free the moth’s wings from the spider’s sticky thread. Either way, this moth was going to suffer. Nonetheless, I rescued the moth from the spider’s web. In my world we need more moth’s.
Human’s have a multitude of webs that entangle us, drugs, alcohol, money, sex, power, envy, ego you name the poison it can grab us, shake us, choke us and send us to our knees. The difference is we typically act as both the spider and the prey, though there are times we are caught in someone else’s web. Over the course of my fifty years I have been trapped in many of the webs that I have weaved myself. On top of my selective OCD I also have an addictive personality. If one slice of pizza is good five should be even better. If one beer mellows, I should be dancing after six. I have learned that finding, accepting and acknowledging the balance of life, balancing my needs and wants, pleasures and pain, is the key to keeping me from getting entangled in whatever web I or others have weaved.
Staying out of someone else’s web requires foresight, awareness and an acute understanding of our own weaknesses. If you are lonely, someone’s web of sex may seem like the solution but for those that have been trapped in that deceit you realize very quickly that the pleasure is short-lived as is the commitment.
I released a moth from certain death Sunday morning but in the end the spider will eventually win. It has built the perfect trap, in the perfect location. When it dies another spider will come along in its place. The only way we can avoid being trapped ourselves is to accept and acknowledge our weaknesses. We need to recognize that the webs that we spin and those spun by other spiders looking to wrap us up and keep us tied tightly are only giving us what we think we want. Finding the balance in living, understanding what you need rather than what you want is the best way to stay out of the spider’s web.
“Any act often repeated soon forms a habit; and habit allowed, steady gains in strength. At first it may be but as a spider’s web, easily broken through, but if not resisted it soon binds us with chains of steel.” – Tryon Edwards